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[cobbledtogetherenvy]

[No recording. Envy doesn't want to talk to any stupid humans.]

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[thereisnothing]

"Will you be able to do something based on dreams," or whatever it is he's looking for in those books, without the connection?"

[cobbledtogetherenvy]

"Apparently, yes, but I don't know how literal any of it is." He doesn't like the sensation of swimming about lost is all. He's used to knowing more than anybody around him, save Father. Humility doesn't come easily to Envy. Having to learn things the normal way stinks.

[thereisnothing]

"That's one of the shitty things about working with dreams." Not that humility comes easily to Sanzo. "Still, I suppose it's interesting that you have access."

[cobbledtogetherenvy]

"It's still all theoretical, and relying on someone else." And it's so frustrating. But he won't be something that can get out of here with only the tools he knows. That's what made him what he is, and he needs to be something else.

[thereisnothing]

Sanzo pinches the bridge of his nose, looking pained. "Relying on someone else, at least a little, seems to be one of those things the Admiral looks for with graduations." It's why he wouldn't be getting out of here.

[cobbledtogetherenvy]

"Well, how am I supposed to influence what other people opt to do?" The whole system is absurd, but this feels like a pronounced unfairness.

[thereisnothing]

"Tch. Here's it's easy enough that even you could probably do it. People are so desperate to help it makes my skin crawl." He shakes his head. "You can just ask someone to help and instead of saying something like 'we help our own' or 'why would I do something for a destructive little demon' they actually try to think of something."

[cobbledtogetherenvy]

Envy's nose wrinkles in distaste, but he can't argue. He distrusts their motives and despises the inconsistencies that constantly crop up. But they sure do think they want to help... "They do what they think will help." But it's a listless protest.

[thereisnothing]

"Yeah." That people are still frequently wrong about what will actually help is at least one tether to reality. "Would you have ever sincerely asked for help, before you landed here?"

[cobbledtogetherenvy]

No is both his first impulse and something that feels true, but he is actually trying to do something. He rubs exhaustedly at his temples. "From family. Not all of them, and not all the time." Those odd, vivid dreams of the Greed he'd known once, cruel and superior, but a friendly presence by Envy's standards. "I tricked people into doing what I wanted. That's as close as it got."

[thereisnothing]

He nods. "Were you able to ask your family because you were working towards the same goal, or was it just that there were some of them who were likely to do something. If you asked, in certain circumstances?"

[cobbledtogetherenvy]

"Some of them were less likely to turn on or eat me," he says with a faint sigh. "But all of us only had the one goal, most of the time, whatever Father set us to do."

[thereisnothing]

"Did you ever envy the humans who could just ask each other for help with shit?"

[cobbledtogetherenvy]

"...They don't generally do that." Envy isn't just being stubborn. He's not really seen the better aspects of humanity in action much. "I did help a human once, but the only other option was sit around until we all succumbed to entropy."

[thereisnothing]

"It's not necessarily common," Sanzo agrees. He wouldn't say that he's seen the better aspects of humanity in action often enough to put any trust in it. "Most people are just driven by what they want, and wanting to survive. Though some like to cover that with other reasons."

He taps his lighter.

"Asking someone directly for help can be an acknowledgement that they have worth."

[cobbledtogetherenvy]

"That they have something you need. That's a pretty mercenary idea of worth." But Envy doesn't sound sour about it. If he had to get a warden, he's glad it's one who doesn't try to dress up these concepts in pretty little lies.

[thereisnothing]

It's a mercenary sort of world, and doesn't see a reason to lie about that. "When I kill an animal to eat, it keeps me alive. I don't consult it. If I ask someone to use their library, it's because they can be useful beyond just having stuff I need."

[cobbledtogetherenvy]

"Why does that follow?" It's possible, sure, but a library is a pretty distinct resource and could easily be the only relevant one on offer.

[thereisnothing]

"Because I could break in and take the books if I wanted. I don't have to ask them for anything. It's taking a chance that they might have something more." He shrugs. "They often don't. But it's different than taking stuff simply by force or trickery."

[cobbledtogetherenvy]

Also appreciated: A warden who takes other reasonable solutions into account. He's forced to nod. "So it's not the asking. It's... being nice about asking."

[thereisnothing]

"It's about at least not immediately burning all your bridges. Wanting shit can mean you have to compromise. Sometimes." Not being as much of a dick as you'd like to be is a type of compromise.

[cobbledtogetherenvy]

"Well, I know that," Envy says testily, but the sourness wavers after a moment. "Well. It wasn't what I wanted, it was an assignment, but."

[thereisnothing]

"It can be different when it's what you want, not just a job. Some people probably find it easier. I hate asking for shit. At least the assassins I can kill." Unlike most people who get on his nerves. "You'll find where you fall. But, yeah, to get out of here I think you'll probably have to... think more about people as people instead of obstacles or entertainment. Luckily, that doesn't mean having to be nice or care about them."

[cobbledtogetherenvy]

"People don't want to have anything more to do with me than I do with them," Envy says. "Same as any other animal." Wardens have to do this stuff. That's different. "I can't just ignore them?"

[thereisnothing]

"You probably can, later." Lucky bastard, free from many of the needs that can drive someone who doesn't want anything to do with other people into interacting with them. "But to escape this place, I think you'll have to make it a choice." He waves his cigarette, he knows it's already a choice. "I think you'll need to try to understand people as people - and decide at that point that you want as little to do with them as possible."